Speak Up

Friday, April 29, 2011

Can You Hear Me Now?

Trying to get a chef on the phone is like trying to get an 8:30 table at Ko on Friday night: it ain't happening. A successful day of communication would mean I get a substantial 3 minute conversation with Erik, one in which we speak in short hand in order to maximize information shared. I'm lucky if I can get Erik on the phone, so if I do I scramble to blurt out the days events and baby milestones before he cuts me off to "put out a fire". I assumed once Erik became a corporate chef, complete with business cards and a blackberry, that he's be easier to get a hold of. HA. In theory a person with two cell phones should be more attainable, but as it turns out one phone call a day is still the norm around here. people in prison get more phone time than that.

- - -  Believe it or not, Erik just called. I haven't really spoken to him all day. It was a  5 minute conversation that abruptly ended with: "Gotta go, getting on the train".  I'll take what I can get.

Food is Love,
Hilary

Friday, April 15, 2011

Who Wins? Who Loses?

Without giving away too many details that really aren't mine to giveaway, Erik was given an opportunity- a fabulous opportunity to be the chef at a new restaurant.  But I am not thrilled, not at all. It would mean moving to Chicago. It's not the moving that concerns me, it's not the thought of having to find a new babysitter or house, it's  not even the thought of having to search and land a new job. The single greatest reason that I didn't say yes right away is my career here.

Yes ladies and gentlemen, the wives of chefs DO have careers. No, I don't mean hosting gala dinners or starring on a real housewives show. I mean a career. I am lucky enough to work at an amazing inner city school that is RUN BY TEACHERS. I am one of those teachers. And although I am part of a large group of teachers/administrators, and I work during the summer, late nights and even some Saturdays, I still get paid $47, 723.

But it seems that Erik thinks because I make less than him, because I'm not motivated by awards, recognition, or reviews for what I do-well it must not be that important. If I got an incredible teaching or administrative opportunity that required us to move Erik wouldn't do it. Not ever. So what is my value? How do the votes work around here? Do I get a certain percentage of votes based on my salary? Isn't everything equal? 50/50? HA, not in this world. No way. Let's not forget I moved to NY 7 years ago, transfered schools and uprooted my whole life to be with Erik. It was a great decision that afforded us both some amazing opportunities, including the job I've got now.

I'm torn about this whole thing. A marriage is a partnership of two people willing to make sacrifices for each other. So am I a bad wife for not wanting to move? Is is he a bad husband for asking me to? If we go then I'll resent him for taking away a job that gives me opportunities to grow and learn that I wouldn't find anywhere else. And if I say no, then Erik will resent me as he reads all the articles about how fabulous the new chef in Chicago is doing. Who wins? Who loses? And why does it always have to feel that way?

Sometimes it feels as if Erik is a teacher hater just like the rest of America is right now. But I know he's not. He adores what I do and he is my biggest fan. It's just that for Erik, the chef coats are gleaming a brighter white than the chalk on my board.

Food is Love,
Hilary

What's My Value?

Without giving away too many details that really aren't mine to giveaway, Erik was given an opportunity- a fabulous opportunity to be the chef at a new restaurant. The reason I'm not jumping for joy? It would mean moving to Chicago. It's not the moving that concerns me, it's not the thought of having to find a new babysitter, it's  not even the thought of having to search and land a new job. The single greatest reason that I didn't say yes right away is my career.

Yes ladies and gentlemen, the wives of chefs DO have careers. No, I don't mean hosting gala dinners or starring on a real housewives show. I mean a career. I am lucky enough to work at an amazing inner city school that is RUN BY TEACHERS. I am one of those teachers. And although I am part of a large group of teachers/administrators, and I work during the summer, late nights and even some Saturdays, I still get paid $47, 723.

But it seems Erik thinks because I make less than him, because I'm not motivated  by awards, recognition, or reviews for what I do-well it must not be that important. If I got an incredible r

Saturday, April 9, 2011

To Make Up For A Few Complaints...

After all the times I've complained I figure its nice to show  one  of the wonderful sides of marriage. For Pete's sake I needed to create an entire blog to connect with  other women and commiserate about our husband's. If we don't celebrate the fabulous moments as well, then what's the point? Let's face it, there are reason- amazing reasons- that we treasure and adore the men we share our lives with.

I love you, Erik.

Food Is Love,
Hilary

Thursday, April 7, 2011

What Will He Choose?

As a mother to a one-quarter Korean baby, I wanted to give Maverik the opportunity  to learn about his culture, as much as I can being a 100% caucasian mother. The first birthday is a big deal in Korean culture and one particular tradition at the big event, is the doljabi. Several objects are placed on a table or rug in front of the baby. The first two objects he picks up will be windows to his future. We set out for Maverik these interesting objects...

spool of yarn- long life

rice- abundance

baseball- athlete

money- wealth

drumstick- musician

notebook- scholar

pencil- teacher

knife- chef

What will he choose?

uh-oh


He picked the pencil! I can't believe he picked the pencil! In a time where teachers are being bashed left and right I don't know how I feel about him entering the classroom, but of I'd support him no matter what. he's my boy!
Just like Mommy!

but it wasn't over yet...He picked. Up. The Knife!! Wow...you should have heard the screaming from our friends, the other kids, and of course ME. WHAAAT? I joke that I'd never wish teaching or cooking upon my worst enemy, and that is partially true. But truth be told: chef, teacher, or culinary professor- Maverik will be given all the support he could possibly need- he'll need it!

Food Is Love, 
hilary 

Friday, April 1, 2011

Desperate Chefs' Wives on NBC this Fall

I've always wanted this blog to be turned into a show or best selling novel, but today gave me a heart attack. This afternoon, APRIL FIRST, Erik told me about an article he saw on Eater. "Desperate Chefs' Wives" the TV show with super famous chefs' wives such as Mrs. Colicchio, Mrs. Andres, and Mrs. Bourdain.  I got nervous right away. How could they use my name? MY NAME?? At first I thought Erik was playing a cruel trick on me, but after I saw the post for myself, i went into panic mode. And all for nothing. 

THIS horrible joke-story which was meant to fool all the foodies of the interwebs fooled me, THE desperate Chef's Wife, the most. I went as far as calling my step dad to get the number of his lawyer. (He was one in litigation with Usher over his record label name) Ok, Jose Andres, you got me. I guess I should have noticed the tag line that read, "april fool's" or the fact that Conan O'Brien's wife was going to be on the show, too. 


Anyone else get it good today?? 

Food is Love, 
Hilary