Speak Up

Friday, May 11, 2012

But We Knew All of This

I've met plenty of chefs' wives and girlfriends to know that the biggest complaint is a close tie between the lifestyle of a chef's widow and the insult of the completely opposite fantasy world that most other people think you live in.

"Your husband must cook for your every night."- no
"Your husband should go on Top Chef"- why?
"I bet you eat so well"- yeah, at other people's restaurants

Sure it's frustrating, but how can we blame the uninformed public. They have no idea what it's like to marry a chef restaurant. Well fear no more ladies, the word is getting out there. With the hype of chefmania at its peak, other wives and girlfriends are sharing the truth:

The Date Report written by this blogger Frites and Fries

Just remember who was on the scene first bringing us all together. I kid, I kid. I love all the wives. 

Food is Love, 
Hilary 

6 comments:

Laura said...

Ha ha, it's so true! I used to get so annoyed by the "your husband must cook for you every night" comment. Now, I just realize most people are jealous. And I think they can't think of anything more interesting to say, honestly. It's kind of like talking about the weather.

K-Itasca, Il said...

For starters, I LOVE this blog! Reading it makes me feel so not alone!

Secondly, I wish I had a camera to capture the look of confusion on people's faces when they ask about the wonderful meals my chef cooks me and my response is "kraft mac and cheese or frozen pizza."

my chef owns his own restaurant, and people are always telling me how lucky I am that I get to eat this amazing food every night (I am at the restaurant every night, but that is a whole other blog in itself) and I just laugh inside when they say this. I don't eat here every night, like I said before, its kiddie food for me, 7 nights a week! I will admit, before before becoming a chefwife, I would have probably assumed the same!

Kerilyn said...

LOVE what you said.. "With the hype of chefmania at it's peak"...

AMEN SISTER. Are you feeling the intensity of all this misconception too?

It's becoming a newfound obsession of mine to help educate the masses... about this very subject.

You will always have my utmost respect for being the place I went to when I needed to not feel alone. I will always be grateful for you.

Jade said...

Yes so true!

"Your husband must cook for you every night" - Ah no, he would be at work... cooking for everybody else.

"Your guys should go on a reality TV show like My Restaurant/Kitchen Rules" Why? So we can get divorced like every other reality TV couple?

"I bet you eat so well". Yep, we eat out A LOT. Or I cook...

"You're so lucky being married to a chef" - Yep, I'm like a single parent raising our two boys who has everything paid for by a husband who lives at work. Like literally. For 16hrs a day. I also get to go to bed, then wake periodically and worry that he's still not home yet and has he crashed on the way home! It's AWESOME!! But then even with all these frustrations I probably wouldn't have it any other way :p

Cheers
JM (AUSTRALIA)

Anonymous said...

I love your blog, I'm a chef and I'm sure my husband is a desperate chef's husband, or maybe not so much because on top of my 70 hr a week job I take care of the laundry, etc etc.... I't must suck to be married to a chef !

MS

Anonymous said...

Sarah (Sydney, Australia)

If I had a dollar for every time someone said 'You're so lucky you're married to a chef, you must have fantastic meals cooked for you all the time!", I'd have enough money to buy a billboard that says 'Chef's wives make their own breakfast, lunch and dinner and eat alone most nights!!'

Seriously though, after my incredulous outburst of 'You've got to be kidding, he's never home to cook!', I explain the hours he works, the number of times we order take out or dine out or the fact that if we do eat at home it's only because I've cooked something.

Sometimes I feel a little haughty having to explain this to people, you know the old I know something you don't know, but when I really think about what I'm saying, it makes me feel sad.

It makes me realise that I'm going to be spending a lot of lonely nights eating dinner by myself for years to come.

Shortly after I stop the pity wagon and hop off, and remind myself that this is the life I've chosen to live with the man I love, and although it's not ideal, I'll just have to suck it up and get on with it.

So thank you for this blog. It makes me feel a little less lonely as I'm sitting here by myself eating a toasted ham/cheese sandwich I've just made for dinner!

PS - It took me 5 years to wean my husband off eating Kraft mac and cheese dinner (straight out of the pot it was cooked in)!! I couldn't stand the smell of it in the house.